24 Jan 2015

adding scars to my heart

after actually short time of calm feelings and kind of happiness,
i came back to my stable state, which i think just loves me.
i am with agreement with my unavoidable destiny.
i would like to run away, but some things are simply impossible.
so what can i do? i just exist.
and as usually listen to all my lovely sad songs

21 Jan 2015


sorry for lack of posts.. i'm still trying to figure out what is happening in my head,
what i think, what i want, this period is going to be the hardest for me.
lots of things changes and i'm amongst them and sometimes i don't know what to do, 
or i regret that i didn't done something. so yea i should be more active and bold
(my dreams also say so)

5 Jan 2015

here i am

beginning of new year was actually perfect, exept the fact that i screwed it up,
like i always do. its actually my best ability, which i can't help.
so here i am. in two days coming back to school, this week having a prom,
and wondering if i still have a hope.
but hey, im still smiling and going to watch 'holiday' on dvd with my mum. 

31 Dec 2014

new year tonight

I don't really have positive mood, although I should.
new year means opportunity for some changes, small inside me and bigger which includes other people. but i felt such safe in this year. 2015 will be like a jump from the cliff into really deep water. i think i will handle it, because i don't have a choice. yesterday i felt really bad from that reason. but now, well i will give the best of me to make this year acceptable. maybe changes won't be so radical, maybe not for worse, maybe i'll change myself a little. noone knows, and that is exciting part. (i'm fighting with thoughts)

anyway today i'm going on a new year's eve party to my friend's house. 
i'm not really keen on parties.. but it would be last with all those people from my class.
but till then, i want to watch last episodes of my faourite series.

i hope this year will bring some luck.
for me and for you <3

30 Dec 2014

new song!

my new song!
today i did a lot of things including mix of that song
so i hope you'll like it c:

29 Dec 2014

first snow

finally snow came! but it could be a little bit warmer inside my house:p

oh, soon it will be new year's eve! i hope new year will be better than this one.
i had bad luck at the end of it. and haha i was thinking about deleting all of my massages on phone, as a sign of new beggining.
and i have to make some resolutions today or tomorrow!
and actually make them come true, because resolutions from this year... i hardly did about one.
i hope the party will be better than i think it is going to be.. (because i'm pessimist)

24 Dec 2014


i wish you all, happy christmas!
and i'm sure it will be full of magical moments <3

and i wish you also a lot of delicious food, which is a big part of christmas :)